I was walking down the street when I was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless woman who asked me for a couple of dollars for dinner.I took out my wallet, got out ten dollars and asked, “If I give you this money, will you buy wine with it instead of dinner?” “No, I had to stop drinking years ago,” the homeless woman told me.
“Will you use it to go shopping instead of buying food?” I asked. “No, I don’t waste time shopping,” the homeless woman said. “I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive.”
“Will you spend this on a beauty salon instead of food?” I asked. “Are you NUTS!!” replied the homeless woman. “I haven’t had my hair done in 20 years!”
“Well,” I said, “I’m not going to give you the money. Instead, I’m going to take you out for dinner with myhusband and me tonight.” The homeless woman was shocked. “Won’t your husband be furious with you for doing that? I know I’m dirty, and I probably smell pretty disgusting.”
I said, “That’s okay. It’s important for him to see what a woman looks like after she has given up shopping, hair appointments, and wine.”
I just know you’re laughing!
You’re gonna send it on – aren’t you?
Peter says:
Sorry. I don’t think that is funny and by posting it shows that you are an insensitive wanker.
10th August 2008 at 2:53 pm
Not gonna say says:
yeah, i also think the same thing. it isnt funny at all. also the reason that you gave the old wowan in the end was a very bad one. you did not show no concern, instead you mocked her. not funny at all.
10th August 2008 at 1:47 pm
Herrin says:
OK 2 points. 1. this is just a story/joke and 2. this is just a story/joke.
10th August 2008 at 12:25 am
randomjoe says:
I thought it was pretty funny.
People that don’t like it probably have ugly wives or are ugly wives and this story is true for them haha.
10th August 2008 at 5:55 am
Still Laughing says:
I think this is a funny joke. I am going to get my wife to tell it today while we are wine touring.
10th August 2008 at 11:23 pm