Men. We love em and need them, but somehow they just seem so damn consistent sometimes.

I heard a joke recently:

“Women love the simple things in life. Like Men.”

So here are 10 things that Men are most unlikely to say. Ever.

10. I think Barry Manilow is really cool.

9. While I’m up can I get you a cup of coffee?

8. I think hairy legs are really sexy.

7. Her tits are just too big!

6. Sometimes I just want to be held.

5. That chick on “Murder, She Wrote”, gives me a fat.

4. Sure, I’d love to wear a condom.

3. We haven’t been dress shopping for ages. Let’s go now. Can I carry your purse for you?

2. Bugger Monday night football. Let’s watch Murphy Brown.

1. I think we’re lost. I’ll pull over and ask for directions.

From the awesomely funny book:

“The Ultimate Book of Rude and Politically Incorrect Jokes”

by Allan Pease. Australia’s funniest and most successful salesman.