Are you tired of those piss weak ‘friendship’ poems that always sound good, but never actually come close to reality?

Well, here is a series of promises that actually speak of true friendship.

You will see no cute little smiley faces on this card –  Just the stone cold truth of a great friendship.1. When you are sad –  I will help you get pickled and plot revenge against the bastard who made you sad.

2. When you are blue — I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.

3. When you smile — I will know you are thinking of something that I would probably want to be involved in.

4. When you are scared — I will rag you about it every chance I get until you’re NOT.

5. When you are worried — I will tell you stories about how much worse it could be until  t you stop whining.

6. When you are confused — I will try to use only little words.

7. When you are sick –  Stay the hell away from me until you are well again.  I don’t want whatever you have.

8. When you fall — I will laugh at your clumsy backside, but I’ll help you up.

9. This is my oath…. I pledge it to the end. ‘Why?’ you may ask;

Because you are my friend.

Friendship is like pissing your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth.